Shaffy Bello Urges Women to Rethink Material Expectations in Relationships
Nigerian actress and singer, Shaffy Bello, has stirred conversations across social media and the entertainment industry after advising women to reconsider the growing culture of material expectations in relationships. The Nollywood star, known for her elegance and strong screen presence, offered the counsel during a recent appearance on the Me, Her & Everything Else podcast hosted by Stephanie Coker.
Bello, while addressing the question of what women bring to the table in romantic relationships, said it was important for women to move away from an entitlement mindset and instead focus on adding value to their partners’ lives. According to her, many women have become defensive or dismissive when asked what they contribute in relationships, choosing instead to focus on what they can receive.
“If he’s bringing something to the table, what are you bringing to the table?” she asked. “You can’t just be needy. That’s not attractive. When you don’t need a man, you are more attractive to him,” she added.
The veteran actress emphasized that independence and confidence make a woman more desirable, suggesting that men are more drawn to women who are self-sufficient and not solely dependent on them financially or emotionally. She urged women to become contributors in relationships rather than passive recipients.
Her remarks have since gone viral, generating widespread reactions, particularly among young women and relationship experts. While some critics argued that Bello’s views might be perceived as harsh or out of touch with societal realities where many women still face financial inequality, others applauded her for promoting a message of self-worth and mutual responsibility.
Several social commentators noted that her stance reflects a broader shift in relationship dynamics, where shared values, emotional support, and partnership are increasingly replacing traditional roles based on dependency. Others pointed out that her advice was not aimed at shaming women, but rather encouraging them to discover and project their own strengths.
Shaffy Bello’s message is seen by many as a reminder that in modern relationships, both partners must strive to bring something meaningful to the table whether emotionally, intellectually, financially, or otherwise. By rethinking the idea of material expectations, she believes women can attract more authentic and balanced partnerships built on mutual respect rather than obligation.
